fanatically emotional

getting this upset over a professional sporting event makes me feel like petulant todder, throwing a tantrum because mommy ran out of my favorite cookies. i mean, while i follow the Green Bay Packers quite closely -- closely enough to know the names of the offensive lineman -- and, thanks to one of the best christmas presents ever, i even own stock in the team, in actuality, i have nothing to do with the on-field success of the green and gold. (or at least, an astronomically small amount, if you consider financial support "something" to do with a team's success.) i don't study game film, i don't work them out, i don't cook them nutritious meals, provide medical care, give massages, or even cut the grass at lambeau. i live far from wisconsin, so i cannot do what even the average fan can and is expected to do: attend games and contribute decibel-laced distractions when my team is on defense.

so then why do i feel so emotionally attached to them and their fate? why did the catastrophic end of their season send me into a spell of depression, replete with ice cream bingeing, soul-searching, topic-avoiding behaviors? i could not sleep last night; i woke up thinking about the mistakes they had made. my dreams were haunted by the blue & silver-clad lugs gloating in their victory. the downcast gaze of donald driver (knowing this may have been his last game), the desperation in rodgers' eyes after he missed finely on third down mid-way through the 4th quarter...i usually listen to espn radio on monday mornings, drinking in the recaps and analyses, good or bad. i'll spend the first 15 min of my day trolling the internet, reading about the games. but today i did neither. i bought a donut, and i ate it, and it did not make me feel better.

how did pro sports trick me, a well-educated, white-collar female, into caring so much? therein lies the beauty of the pro sports team concept: a welcome distraction from the ups and downs of "regular" life -- a distraction that we, the "regular" people, will spend lots and lots of money on. furthermore, it's reality TV at its finest: truly unscripted, the outcome unfolding before your eyes, with genuine characters who deserve to be there far more than any characters on The Real Housewives of Suburbia. but that describes even a casual, bandwagon fan (see: 99% of people outside of Texas wearing a Cowboys jersey in the mid-to-late 90's). a true fan rides the highs with the lows, the 15-1 seasons with the 5-11's. she appreciates the game, and a team's approach, attitude, philosophy, just as much as the latest top draft pick or big-name player to be signed. how do we treat the role players? how do we talk about the victories? how do we treat these "losers"? i don't know how, but i love them just the same.

**like most blog posts, i start out wanting to take it one direction & veer off into another. i cannot focus. college writing courses were unsuccessful at teaching me to pick a thesis topic and STICK TO IT. so, i will end thesis 1 (why do i care so much about a silly pro sports team?) and move onto thesis #2:**

why is our culture so myopic with regards to losing?

fine. i trolled the internet a little bit today. and came across this article:
http://www.jsonline.com/sports/packers/reality-finally-catches-up-to-the-packers-t53qao6-137399023.html

which infuriated me. yes, that's what many of us packers fans were thinking. but to put it so bluntly really takes away from the accomplishments of a 1-loss season. the level of play and consistency of the team was elevated. records were broken, resolves were tested, guts were checked...a total failure? please. see: the 2008 detroit lions. (true sports fans are not above a dig aimed at a conference rival.)

gah. time for another donut.