older, wiser, and lamer

there are at least two stages of getting old that i am aware of. (retirement is probably the third, but i haven't hit it yet.) 

the first: you can't keep up like you used to. can't work out as much or as hard, can't drink as much, can't party as hard, can't play as many points of Ultimate, can't get by on as little sleep for as many days in a row. but you still try. your body complains, but it complies.

the second is when you stop trying. you accept that your body finds it physically too challenging. you sit out more points. you fall behind a round. you go to bed early.

i have been in stage two for a while now. i can't decide if i like it. i struggle with accepting it. sometimes i focus on the positives: less drinking, more sleep, and being kinder to your body in general is a far healthier lifestyle. being healthy feels good, and it affords you more time to do more things. 

but by drinking less, sleeping more, and doing less "crazy", you miss out on a lot. "crazy" forges memories. i remember far more nights when i stayed up late than when i went to bed at a reasonable hour. there are exceptions, for sure -- the relaxing new years eve spent snowed-in in the swiss alps -- but it was in the fucking swiss alps. getting there was crazy. i still regret the night i went to bed early in australia. 

i suppose i could try to find a balance. less drinking, but still less sleep. play less hard, save more for partying. instead of trying to rally for the party that won't start until 11pm, accept this fact, and go hard at the beer garden at 6:30.  

i mean, at least go to the freaking beer garden, right?