pegs and holes

in the classic scenario of the square peg trying to fit into a round hole (or vice versa), is it the peg's fault or the hole's? or the force driving the peg through the hole?

for some time now, i have been trying desparately to fit myself -- the square peg -- into graduate school -- the round hole. it's not working. it's not a match. but is it my fault? am i to blame? or is blaming me as ridiculous as blaming a square peg for not fitting in a round hole?

part of being happier, improving my life, is figuring out what's making me unhappy and deciding whether i need to change myself, change my environment, or both. i'm beginning to see what it is that makes me so unhappy in grad school. and while those issues won't magically disappear if i decide to change directions, a different path may suit me better. the things that i have the hardest time doing are the same things one must be comfortable doing in order to suceed in grad school. now mind you, these are things that are worthwhile to be able to do -- speak up for yourself, seek help when you need it, set limits for yourself, all while not feeling guilty or like you've failed in some major way -- however they do not necessarily have to be your strong points if you are to suceed in life in general.

so, should i continue to try to cram my squareness into the roundness of graduate school, hoping that eventually we'll arrive at a mutually deformed shape that permits my passage, or should i seek out a square hole that more readily and less painfully lets me slide through? oh, if only life were as simple as playing with toys...