womanness

i think i just made up a word.

anyways, i often am struck by the differences between men and women. not the obvious physical ones, or even the fact that we have different chromosomes. why are women, in general, more emotional and introspective? why are men, in general, more combative and competitive? scientists (not me) are starting to discover psychobiological differences between men and women -- not only discrepancies in the anatomical features of the brain, but in function as well. but why?

i got to thinking about this after talking with leslie, enrique's girlfriend (fiance? heck, she's practially his wife), at the departmental holiday party. we got to talking about how "it" was going, "it" being my project of course. and i said it had its ups and down, that it's hard for me sometimes to get motivated, etc etc. and she very insightfully said, that's typical of women. women tend to take things personally -- even things over which we have little control -- while men get combative, competitive. they see it as an offense, a challenge, get pissed off. they go about things differently, respond & react in a more productive manner. she recommended that the next time i was struggling or wondering if i was overreacting, i go talk to a guy, not a girl, and see what he would do in the same situation. which is an interesting suggestion, as i would usually mope by myself or go seek out a female friend's condolences. and i usually find myself trying to be nice and agree with my female friends, rather than challenging them. interesting...i feel like there was a lot more to this conversation, but it was the end of the evening, and well, i was a little sedated by then, so the details are a little fuzzy.

this also made me wonder if women in general really aren't suited to science -- or to any sort of pressure-driven, competitive environment. are we less good at the hard, technical jobs because we are more adept at tasks that require soft, intuitive cognitive fuctions? maybe larry summers (the president of harvard) was right afterall. it's not that we're not smart enough. it's that we're hard-wired to do other tasks better, ones that require compassion and a knack for interacting with people -- things that take advantage of rather than punish our emotionality.

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in other news, i lost 5 lbs between the last 2 times i last weighed myself, which were less than a week apart, but at the beginning and end of my period. fucking water retention. i really hate my uterus sometimes.